Monday 14 October 2019

Lessons from my couch



By Kate Haddow

I have just recently submitted my PhD for examination and I am nervously awaiting a viva date. So as I struggle to adjust to life after the PhD and also try avoiding my viva prep books whilst sitting in my PJ’s, wrapped in my fluffy dressing gown, I have decided to use this time instead to write some reflections from my own experiences, things I wish I had known before my PhD journey.

1.       There is always that one twat - So whether it is someone you keep seeing at conferences, on Twitter or even your office. There is always that one twat or sometimes an entire bunch of people who make you feel like you’re totally inept and you’re not doing the PhD right.  The type of person who could take a shite in front of you and it would be a glitter covered, shimmering log coming out their hoop as your blinded by the sun shining out of their arseholes.  You know what I mean, already published like 10 articles, research is going as smooth as an Otter in a car wash, always has their shit together, you never see them in tears and you just know they will land a fab permanent job as doors miraculously open for them.  My advice, ignore those people, don’t compare yourself to others.  A PhD is a very personal journey on which we encounter various and disparate problems both personal and in relation to your institution too, just do the best you can. 


2.       Twitter is amazing but be careful - Personally I love Twitter and it has definitely aided my PhD. It has put me in touch with some wonderful people who have given me sound advice, not to mention the opportunities such as conferences, free papers to download and job opportunities.  But of course there is a down side to all this and for me I have had to learn to better manage my time on Twitter and there are times were I have to just come off it completely.  Twitter can be very distracting and you can easily spend a full morning scrolling through it, before realising you have not done a thing. But for me I also found Twitter sometimes made me anxious, because I would see people tweeting about working really long hours or spending the weekend writing a paper. For me now I limit my time on Twitter and I rarely go on at weekends, because I don’t work them, but I understand some people prefer to work outside of the standard 9-5 paradigm, but I also see a lot of people sort of bragging about working long hours and at weekends as if it’s a badge of honour too.  In essence do what works best for you, but try to get a good balance.

3.       Have a crew in and out of academia - during my PhD I developed a little group of friends doing PhD’s or who had completed their PhD’s, these friends were central in me getting to this point.  But also I want to give a shout out to friends who have been with you before the PhD and how important it is to have to have people outside of academia around you too, it never hurts to be kept grounded in reality.

4.       Learn to say NO – I’m not sure if this is a gender thing or a class thing or a mixture of the two thing’s thing, although I suspect both.  I have always felt like that person who does a lot, generally unpaid and is often underappreciated whilst there is always someone willing to take the credit for my efforts. Sure enough when I started the PhD I took on these ‘opportunities’ left, right and centre.  But there came a point when I realised I was sick and tired of being exploited and that my time was becoming increasingly precious as my PhD progressed, although I found it very hard, so I started to say no a lot more.  Guess what?  The world did not come to end and it made life so much easier.

5.       Go to conferences - Ok so when I found out conferences were a big part of academic life I think I nearly shit myself. If I am honest I didn’t really know what a conference was? In my head it was just people in suits with brief cases, standing in a big room being very middle class and eating smoked salmon sandwiches.  I was too embarrassed to ask what happened. What did I need to do?

I still struggle with conferences, I wouldn’t say I was natural networker.  I think anyone who knows me reading this will be like girl? Whattttt? I think I am known for being quite loud and apparently I command a presence (not sure if that’s a good thing or not?). But many times at conferences I have panicked and felt very anxious about talking to a room full of strangers, I have literally at times sat in the toilets for most of the lunch hour or ran outside and pretended that I smoke and just sat on bench somewhere in efforts to keep calm. OK so there is no doubt conferences can be very nerve wrecking and most of us feel that.  But sitting reflecting on my conference experiences on the whole they have been really positive.  They are where I have met some wonderful people, who have not just supported me personally but shaped my PhD.  They are also a good opportunity for putting your research out there and letting people know what you’re doing.

6.       Use your holidays - It always amazes me how many PhD students don’t know there entitlements when it comes to holidays or don’t even know they are entitled to holiday’s on top of things like bank holidays, Easter or Christmas etc. Every institution or funding body has policies around annual leave for research students, make sure you know what your entitlements are and use them or lose them. When I say holiday I don’t necessarily mean a trip away where you pay £10 for a pint in the departure lounge or eating ‘Lays’ crisps on a sun lounger. Even a staycation of Netflix box set streaming or just spending time with your family away from the research, e-mails and supervisors can be a form of holiday. As PhD students we are if you like the next generation of academics, I think it’s important we set a good example and not add to this culture of working 90 hour weeks and revising articles on our sun loungers.  You need a break at times, it’s that simple and it never hurts to come back refreshed with new ideas.

7.       Find how you work best - When I started my PhD I always felt if I wasn’t in our office that I essentially wasn’t working in the ‘correct’ way and that I was bunking off. In all honesty I hated working in that office.  Despite our office being quite modern, it was always either freezing cold or boiling hot, there was no happy medium.  It also resembled a call centre layout, as we each had our own little booth, with no window to people watch out of.  If anything I found it too quiet and I was freighted to sneeze too loud. I would find any excuse to go and talk to someone and I soon realised I was that annoying person who can’t whisper! I decided to boycott the office for local cafes or my couch in the living room and the majority of my PhD has been written in these locations. People often say to me “oh I don’t know how you can work from home” but I feel the same way about the office. It took me a while, but find ‘your own space’ where you are comfortable working, certainly don’t feel bad if it’s not in your assigned office space.


8.       Having a good supervisory team - So I don’t have room to tell you the full story about my convoluted supervisory experiences, your attention to this blog is probably wavering already. I am not saying your supervisor has to be your bestie, but I can’t emphasise how important it is to have the right person for your project.  Speaking as someone who got the right person eventually, it made a world of difference to me and my PhD. I had to put up a bit of a fight to get the tailored supervisory arrangements I eventually got however, indeed someone told me you need to pick your fights carefully when doing a PhD.  But for me getting the correct team behind you is a fight very much worth having.

9.       You are more than your PhD - It really saddens me to see people getting genuinely upset and stressed about their PhD’s. Of course I too have cried over mine and threatened to quit, but some of the awful prolonged stressful states I have seen friends in really does hurt. You are more than your PhD, and indeed yes you have a life beyond the PhD and yes there are things more important than the PhD, like your physical and mental wellbeing or your family and friends.  Don’t concentrate on one and lose sight of the other and finally don’t let it consume your bloody life!

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4 comments

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